Parents caring for child with MS

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DebMartin
Parents caring for child with MS

I am 56 and I have been caring for my 30 year old son for several years. Andrew can no longer walk and has a severe right arm tremor. There are such weird lines between parenting and caregiving. He attacks me verbally when he feels like I'm acting like an interfering mother. He complains about anything I cook for him. He says he wants independence from me but he is trapped. a good example;
He had a major poop explosion on Sunday night and in my frustration on my hands and knees scrubbing poop out of carpets off his scooter on the bathroom floor and all over the toilet I said you need to watch your diet. He eats nothing but fast food. He has a car equipped with a lift and hand controls so he drives himself. Our basement is set up as a private apartment with a ramp. We have tried to give him as much freedom as we can.
back to the poop story, I regretted saying anything about his diet when he was upset because his body attacked him again. I wrote him a note apologizing the next morning but it was too little too late for him. He sent scathing emails filled with hate (I don't read them anymore). He hasn't spoken to me since. I have severe RA and am dealing with health issues too, painful hands and feet and severe fatigue. I am emotionally drained. I love my son. P.S. his dad lives in another state and because andrew is attending grad school I can't insist he go spend time with his dad so we are trapped with each other HELP!