Tearful

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Chanteuse8
Tearful

I have become my father's primary caregiver this last year. He has a host of serious medical issues--including congestive heart failure, liver disease, dementia, HIV. He has also survived 2 strokes. He was already struggling with undiagnosed mental illness before his physical health began to deteriorate. His relationship with me and the rest of our family members is very strained. He has said and done so many horrible things that very few relatives still remain in contact with him. He was just hospitalized for the third time in the past 10 months. Each time he is admitted, his health takes an overall turn for this worse. I have had to navigate managing his finances, moving him out of his apartment, transitioning him into an assisted living facility and then out of the ASL facility when it was closed due to mismanagement of funds. My father isn't even 70 years old yet, but he has the health of a man 20 years his senior. I used to be angry and resentful that he moved to the city where I live without telling me how ill he was. I'm his only child, so there really isn't anyone else (aside from my mother--his ex-wife) to care for him. Right now, I'm just feeling really sad and tearful. I don't feel anger or bitterness anymore, but it's painful to watch my father slowly die at such a, relatively, young age. I know everyone here has their own sad story. How do you all cope? How do you process the grief, sadness and other overwhelming emotions?